I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Im part way to drunk.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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