and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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