It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
