Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize