problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I want to fling myself into the sun
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
