90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
