You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize