Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
