If i come over, it means nothing
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
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