Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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