you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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