i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i think i have two assholes
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
