Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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