I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
