the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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