You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
