I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
