Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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