My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
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