R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
