Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
