I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
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