Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
She's the barista slut.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
