Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize
