He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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