Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
