umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize
