HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
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