I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I want to stick my p in your. b.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize