return my video game
North Korea, Best Korea!
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
