and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize