i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
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