Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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