Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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