got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
