Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
