why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
