He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
