then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
