i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize