I must be too annoying 4 u.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
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