I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
