Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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