Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
