Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
