I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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