This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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