your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
