One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
