everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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